Appreciation

The first pastor I remember became a friend and encourager long after he was no longer my pastor

S.E. Fairbanks

I remember being in second grade and hearing news about the arrival of a new pastor and his family. I was disappointed for two reasons:

First, the youngest of his two children was much older than me—a 5th grader. Second, both of his children were girls. To a second-grade mind, those were big things.

Even so, for the next ten years, Marvin was pastor of the Dallas Church of the Nazarene (now, The Grove Community) in Dallas, Oregon. I am sure that I cannot recall a single sermon he ever preached or any of the board discussions I sat through.

I do remember clearly church campouts, softball games after Sunday evening church, and lots of potlucks. I remember Marvin showing up for basketball games and taking me golfing for the first time (I still can’t golf worth anything, though).

Nearly every week from second grade through my senior year of high school, Sunday was my dad singing and Marvin preaching. Then, if we add in Sunday evenings, Wednesday nights, and various other activities throughout the course of ten years, the formational and foundational impact cannot be underestimated.

The thing is, though, Marvin’s impact on my life did not stop when I left for college, and he and his wife moved on to a new pastorate at the Everett Church of the Nazarene.

Looking back, I think my love and appreciation for Marvin and his wife were cemented after they left Dallas. I remember summer trips up to Everett with my brother and childhood friends from the Dallas church to visit them and see Ken Griffey Jr. play ball at the old Kingdome. Later, we also caught a couple of ballgames at the beautiful new Safeco Field.

They didn’t have to keep investing in us as we grew into young adults and began careers, but they did.

When I started feeling a call to move overseas to teach, they invited me to come and share at their church in Everett. And when I returned two years later, they were among the first people I wanted to see. Of course, I was invited again to come and share with their congregation. I learned to play guitar during my two years of teaching in Indonesia. One of the first times I ever played in public was at the Everett Church of the Nazarene.

When I met Tamara, and we began to date and then got married, they embraced her just like she had been one of the teens they had known back in the day. Even after they retired from ministry, the visits continued as they would come and hear us speak anytime we were in the area. When Grace and Elijah came along, the visits were infrequent (as we were overseas for years at a time), but they were loved like grandkids. When Marvin his wife moved to Eugene, Tamara and I stayed at their place and enjoyed meals at the Olive Garden. They set up speaking engagements for us and continued to be a voice of encouragement and strength in our lives.

More than anything, I think I’ll remember that every time Marvin heard us speak, he would make sure to say something like,

“Your message today about doing everything in love….it was spot on. It’s a message we all need to hear over and over again.”

I know they had their own children, grandkids, and many people that are very close to them. But when we were with them, we felt like an important and valued part of their life. That’s a gift to be able to feel that way and a gift of theirs to make people feel that way.

In 2017 Tamara and I were surprised by the arrival of our third child, Maelee. Having spent a few days with family in Coquille, Oregon, to allow them to meet their newest grandchild and niece, we were in the Eugene airport checking in for our long trans-Pacific flight back overseas. It was early in the morning, and having an eight-week-old infant added to the stress of making sure everything was in order.

Much to our surprise and delight, as we were waiting for the check-in desk to open, in through the door walked Marvin and his wife. We had seen them earlier that year, but they hadn’t had a chance to meet little Maelee. What a wonderful surprise and blessing! They sat with us while we waited to check our bags and go to our gate.

I’m so glad they decided to come to the airport that morning as that was the last time we saw Marvin. When we were home in the summer of 2019, our plans to meet were interrupted by a conflict in their schedule, and subsequent attempts to find a time to get together did not pan out. Then, although we were in the States again in 2020, covid restrictions kept us from being able to meet. In February of 2021, Marvin passed away at the age of 83. A life well-lived, if for no other reason than the impact it had not me, though I know I was not the only one.

For forty years, this couple were a meaningful part of my life and ministry. There aren’t a lot of people for whom that can be said.

They ministered to me, encouraged me, and played a role in shaping me into the person and minister I am today. To put it simply, I want to be more like Marvin.

And for that, I am thankful.

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